Portugese Settlement

Just got back from Malacca.. the 'historical' city coz I'm having a 4 day course there. Not so much to be talked about except the food at the hotel are damn good. We're having ice cream for lunch and plenty dessert waiting on the table to be swallowed. We being informed that the owner of the hotel is an Indian Muslim. But I wonder how did he managed to built a hotel at the sea-side of Portuguese Settlement. Or maybe he got some Portuguese blood in his so he get the permission to open a hotel there.

For the past few months, I realized something.. About myself to be specifically. Something we dont know what our capability is. We only do what we want to do and be confident about our ability but we don't realize that actually we're nothing. We thought we're really good at something so we wanted to forgo our visualisation and proudly did what we wanted to do. However, at certain point, things aren't work out like we plan it will. So then we'll stop for a sec and thinking back. Am I doing the right thing? Am I really good at doing this as what I always believe I am? Am I this?? Am I that??

Recently two person told me that two different things about myself that helped me to see things clearly. Say... I before I believe I can be a good writer. But I was totally wrong. Nobody ever read my blogs and the only person who read my blog is my best friend and she read it because I asked her to. So shameful. I feel sorry for myself for misunderstanding my level. Nobody will ever read my blog so I think from now on I can write anything I wanted to. Especially things happened in my 'colourful' life. Another thing is that 1 of my friend told me that actually my way of pointing out my opinion is a bit harsh. My expression is like over reacting and might change the view of people, people who don't know me, towards me.

I never realise any of that two weakness in me. First I'm totally wrong about me being a good writer. Then once again, I'm totally wrong about me can present really well. So I sit back.. and thinking for a couple of days. That I need to improve myself. I can be a better person and will be a better person. It's just that the learning process might need longer period. Probably more than others.. Since my attitude is not like other. Urghh.. I hate myself for being so overconfident about my abilities.

So what I should do??? I think I'm going to absorb the skills as efficient as I can and turn me more practical and be better than ever.. Insya Allah..